An Addendum

Yesterday when sharing with my t’ai chi instructor about the previous day’s delightful encounter with the grasshopper I used a new word in the story: intention. “When the grasshopper centered himself and leapt with intention to my coat and to the blade of grass he was graceful and precise.” My instructor pointed out that the grasshopper had never been either place- not to my coat nor to the blade of grass- and yet he was able to make both of those leaps precisely and gracefully. Being centered and moving with intention focused his actions.

When the grasshopper was fleeing down the sidewalk his movements were frenetic and frantic. I had interrupted his early evening stroll with the possibility of, well, frankly, death and who wouldn’t be a little frenetic and frantic when faced with death? One clomp of my sturdy shoe and he wouldn’t have to wonder where he could get his lovely tweed suit pressed, it would be permanently pressed for him. His need for the moment was to propel himself out of harm’s way and indeed he did that but it distracted him from his original intent which may have been, like most of us, to find a little meal and a quiet place to rest for the evening.

While the flight or fight response is critical in emergencies- like a giant coming after you- it isn’t really required on a daily basis. For the most part we don’t have literal giants here in our world but, certainly, there are figurative ones that we encounter in our daily lives: work, commitments, time constraints, financial constraints, bills, health crisis, healthcare crisis, the economy, the housing collapse, the banking collapse, the elections, polar bears, the future of our country and of our world. There’s a lot to be frenetic about if you want to be.

I know for a fact that I have often moved in frenetic and frantic ways in my day-to-day life. When I’m busy I think “Hey, I’m important. My job is important. I am needed.” And while those things are true in and of themselves, they don’t define me as a person- many people can say those very same things- and they don’t express who I am as an individual. I’m discovering that by being driven only by external forces I’m not paying attention to my internal goals. I’m being sidetracked by a giant’s shoe.

In this past year I have had encounters with a real giant’s shoe, a really giant shoe: breast cancer that migrated into the lymph nodes. It’s not the kind of shoe you ever plan to take home with you but there it is. What I have learned is that with many things in life including an illness you may not get to choose the shoe but you certainly do get to choose the outfit to go with it. As Tim Gunn from ‘Project Runway’ says weekly “Make it work, people! Make it work!”

And so I am. In living with a diagnosis of cancer, rather than allowing it to move me in a frantic and frenetic way, it has given me the opportunity to center myself and move with intention. This is taking some focus, well actually re-focus, and practice. And just as with other things I’ve learned in my lifetime I’m getting guidance and support from a number of good teachers. When the student is ready the teachers will appear. And I am ready to live consciously and with intention.

So the grasshopper, that dear, dapper fellow, was much more than just a heralder of autumn. He was really a reminder and example to me to center myself and move with intention. The same opportunity is there for you, too. If it’s not something you’re already doing why not give it a try? You might just end up in a place you’ve never known but always knew you were meant to be…

With peace,
Karen